It's time to looking for quick fixes and instant gratification and celebration.

November 09, 2021 by Kyira Wackett in Values-Driven Learning

We feel the need to instantly judge our worth or success based upon mistaken beliefs that perfection is the only option when we try for something and unless we get the reaction and celebration from others, it is not worth it. One wrong move and we are a failure, broken or a loser. But by searching for and striving for immediate results — and getting it all right on the first try, we lose sight of the fact that 10 seconds of fame or one more bullet point to add to our resume does not define us.

We are defined by the culmination of our choices, experiences and, more importantly, who we are.

Nothing sustainable happens in one try and it is through the evolutionary process of living that we find true "success" and joy.

Trust me, I get it. We all have a little Veruca Salt inside of us screaming, "I want it now!" Patience is hard. Waiting sucks. Instant gratification feels way better (at least in the moment) than sitting with ambiguity and anticipation. Especially when we already see a path in front of us and guaranteed outcomes, it creates a false sense of empowerment and motivation. But, in my own pursuits, playing the instant gratification game or choosing the path of least resistance to try and get success from someone else's courage, I can tell you that living in a false truth or someone else's narrative never grants true joy.

Decision Fatigue. The chronic condition we keep perpetuating in our daily lives.

September 28, 2021 by Kyira Wackett in Values-Driven Learning

Have you ever been so exhausted that even the smallest choice feels overwhelming?

Trust me, you are not alone. So what can we do about it?

Did you know that time of day is one of the biggest factors affecting our decision making? It makes sense, right? Throughout our day, we are inundated and exhausted by more choices and tasks that use up our time and energy coins.

This means that, as the day goes on, and our f*ck budget dwindles, we do not have as much time and energy to allocate, leaving us overwhelmed by and/or apathetic to the decisions left to make and often just doing what we can to stay within the status quo.

But the problem is that it is not just a greater sense of hurriedness or apathy that develops. See…

Busyness: Not a Badge of Honor but a Deadly Disease

August 17, 2021 by Kyira Wackett in Values-Driven Learning

I was absolutely the person that wore busyness as if it were a badge of honor that made me "better" because I was always doing something. And it makes sense. We live in a culture where busyness is one of our primary forms of social capital. Even when we talk about self-care, meditation, and self-improvement, people are always trying to do more rather than less.

Why Productivity is Not Enough to Create the Life you Deserve.

August 10, 2021 by Kyira Wackett in Values-Driven Learning

It’s easy to fill our time with tasks, to do's, worries, thoughts, and mindless social media scrolling sessions. Like gas in an enclosed container, "stuff" will always take up as much space in our life as we allow. And then it becomes wishful thinking to assume that we will ever live a life that is not “busy.” All “busy” really means is that we are consumed by these thoughts, feelings and behaviors and do not know how to move past, or separate ourselves, or to work more effectively within them.

From here, the idea of productivity was born. Being able to manage our time and energy most effectively to progress towards our goals and complete the tasks at hand more efficiently and with greater ease. This first step was excellent in the process of treating the disease of busyness. It forced people to use systems of delegation, automation, deleting, and prioritization. But productivity often misses some key concepts that can only be mastered when we take it to the next level of elevation -- Intentional Productivity.

It’s Okay to Make Plans That Aren’t “Productive”

July 27, 2021 by Kyira Wackett in Values-Driven Learning

Last week I had the opportunity to spend time with a dear friend and colleague — yay for vaccines and the opportunity to see people again in a safe way!

But interestingly, leading up to that day, I had a mix of emotions rumbling around in my brain. I was excited to see her, absolutely but was also anxious about taking this time away from when I “could” be working. One of the gifts of COVID for many of us is that invitation from our shame to go deeper into the should bank and really squeeze every ounce of the “you should be more productive” account.

I thought about canceling a bunch of times. Not because I wanted to but because a major part of my brain thought I had to. But the more I took time to get clear on the roots of these different thoughts, the more I was able to decipher the voice behind the pressure, shame and guilt. It wasn't just one person or situation but a culmination of experiences and situations in which I felt like my worth was dependent on how much I did and what success I had. Situations where fun didn't translate to any social capital that felt relevant.

How sad is that? To live in a brain that has internalized messages that engaging in social joy brings you no social capital?