REAL TALK: You WILL let people down.

in

You will let people down.

Radical acceptance is about controlling what you can control and letting go of the rest. Now, as I say this, you are probably thinking, "well, sure, but I can control whether or not I let people down. That's a ‘me’ problem because what I do is causing them pain, right?" WRONG.

Sure, there are circumstances that we can reflect back and see that we have been a jerk. We've done something hurtful or harmful to others — either personally or collectively (such as making a racist or oppressive comment).

Those points are our responsibility.

But what I am focusing on here is not that.

Read More

Grief. We need to actually start talking about it.

in

I had the most incredible conversation with Courtney Passfield and Fiona Daley on their podcast, Your Daley Pass.

Courtney unexpectedly lost her father-in-law a few weeks before we recorded this episode ago. The intensity and complexity of her grief — and her willingness to process this together — allowed us to share in this beautiful space of exploration wherein we could look at the complexities of grief and emotion — anger, resentment, fear, pain, longing, etc — and make space for it.

We talked about grief as it pertains to death but also explored the impact of grief in other zones and areas of loss. And whew — it was intensely therapeutic and raw for all of us. One of the most significant spaces of curiosity was around emotional processing and the fears of getting stuck in grief (or a subset of it).

“What evidence do you have that you will get stuck there?”

Read More

Fear. The only way through it, is through it.

in

When our belief system is rooted in the fear that we are always a step away from losing connection — one of the things we need most of all to survive and thrive in this world — of course, we will find ourselves existing in a state of defense.

How many thoughts have our fear brains turned into certainties?

How often have they taken something uncomfortable and turned it into something detrimental? And how has that affected the way we show up in our daily lives?

Read More